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elusivepsycho

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(no subject) [Jul. 13th, 2007|06:37 pm]
elusivepsycho
[current disposition |hungryhungry]

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(no subject) [Jul. 13th, 2007|04:03 am]
elusivepsycho
[current disposition |annoyedannoyed]

There's nothing wrong with having insomnia.
There is something wrong with having insomnia due to a sometimes throbbing dull ache or a stabbing pain in your jaw and the inability to pay for the dental work to make it cease. I have no problems with going to a dentist. I have an irrational fear of being unable to pay for the work.
The complete inability to pay for it is even more irritating.
How many people out there have to go through this every time they quit a job?
It's -stupid-. Medical care of -all- kinds is important....why is it so hard to -get- ? Especially for those in need.
Perhaps it's the pea brained leeches out there that take advantage of government aid and make it so hard
for anyone else to get.
It annoys me that I know I only have serious issues with this when I have been under a lot of stress.
For some reason....I am not well when I am spazzing at all times. 
Hah. The source of my dental pain. I clench, grind, and generally damage my teeth when I sleep if I am having issues with stress
or anger. Wonderful, no?

Now...this move to Ohio has done me worlds of good. Don't get me wrong.
But right now I'm worrying over whether or not I can find another job that will pay me what i need to be making.
And obsessing over how insanely shit my resume is. 
I keep going crazy over whether or not I can pay for my car....my insurance...it's maddening.
None of this is easy right now. 
Uprooting oneself and moving to an entirely foreign-like place is....weird.

I realise I have family. Tons of it. 
But it's hard to think about at the same time.
These are people that I do not know. People I should know. People who know what I went through.
It all hurts in a very fresh wound sort of way.
All of this. And I need someone to talk to. To hash things out with.
And at this point my sister is unable to care. 
I am running out of people I can count on to be there. 
Including family.

So...if there's a god-thing out there...
Do me a tiny favor.
Twist that little cog back into place so things will start running smoothly...just for a while?
Thanks.

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(no subject) [Jul. 11th, 2007|07:09 pm]
elusivepsycho
http://totebo.com/mko.php?c=pUorrBotpotFtorFBoUBopBuosruroaSNNSYotUqs


o_o
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(no subject) [Jul. 11th, 2007|03:46 am]
elusivepsycho
[current disposition |draineddrained]

I think I'm selfish.
am i wrong?
please tell me i'm wrong.
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Because traveling is good [Jul. 7th, 2007|12:52 am]
elusivepsycho
[current disposition |okayokay]








This is all from travel and arrival...and a dinner with gramma.
she's got some mad quilting skills.
:D
It was an interesting trip home.
There were storms off and on the entire time.
But for the most part it was uneventful.
But anyway. 
You can see how lost i got in St.Louis.
You can see the squirrels that are in springdale i believe.
you can see the construction in odd places around UC.
You can see the taller buildings that i'm ecstatic to be able to see again.
and the front of my new home.
and the scenery again.
you can also likely tell how happy i am to be home.
i'm getting used to the traffic and the layout of the city quicker than i predicted.
but anyway. the point of the post. to tell ya'll i'm okay. and to give you some blurry pictures to look at.
;) and yes. the squirrel has eyes painted on him.
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(no subject) [Jul. 1st, 2007|12:13 am]
elusivepsycho
[current disposition |gigglygiggly]

I am officially home!
No. Seriously.
No more arkansas!
I am officially back home. ^_^
this makes me very happy. 

YAY CINCINNATI!!
now time for wild party.
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(no subject) [Jun. 24th, 2007|01:51 am]
elusivepsycho
FIVE DAYS LEFT!!!! 

it's been an uneventful week.
hopefully this last one will be just as easy. 

^_^ 
see ya'll in five days.
what few of you are still alive out there.
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(no subject) [Jun. 10th, 2007|12:53 am]
elusivepsycho

:) i am almost back.
almost a northerner again.
all that is left is to go give the good ol' two weeks notice...and move the rest of my crap home.

being in cincinnati for my birthday...is SUCH A TEASE!

so. that's the update. i'll be back soon.

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(no subject) [Apr. 8th, 2007|09:06 pm]
elusivepsycho

As most of you know. I'm offline for a while again. May be a month. May be three.
Not sure. But I'm off after tonight. I'll talk to ya'll later. 
Those of you that should have my address probably do. If not. Ask around. 
Same with the phone number. Just no long distance.
g'bye for a while. ^_^

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(no subject) [Mar. 26th, 2007|12:09 am]
elusivepsycho

So here we go again. 
My sister has gone to ohio for a few days to see if she can find an apartment and a job.
If she can do this. There's a very real possibility we're -really- going home this time.
When? I'm not sure. But not too long from now. 
While this may seem like something you've heard before....that's too bad.
I don't know for sure about anything. But I do know that I really want this to happen.
In other news. I don't have any other news. haha.
Same old same old. Some days I'm up. Some days I'm down. Most days....I can't wait to go to sleep.
The weather out here is really quite annoying. Storm clouds should=rain. Regardless of any changes 
to forecast.
Tsk.
My financial situation is evening back out. I can afford to take care of myself.
And kitty is adapting to missing his front claws -very- well.
The brothers trip to little rock did go a little strangely, however.
We got this phone call on the way back. Saying he's got signs of rejection again and he needs to go back 
to the hospital.
Right. Okay. So this is getting old. I have no vacation time and no personal time and if I take him back up
 there I will miss a day and lose my job, right? Right.
So I tell my sister. She calls them back and basically tells them to look over their results again.
Turns out that it's only -minor- rejection due to their stupid asses changing his medication all the time.
Which is unstable medication anyway. 
They find out it's mild enough that if they change his meds and send him to a follow up doctors appointment 
-here- then all will be well. So long as he does fine. 
All this is what really prompted my sister to go find a job and whatnot. I mean...how many heart transplant 
specialists with experience enough to properly medicate him -are- there down here? gee. not very many.
You drive up north. There's like 500 different people you can see. All of whom know what they are doing.
So. We shall go back up north. To make damn sure that the brother will be alright. To take care of him 
and everyone else.

That's the news really.
And nothing I'm ever certain off. It's in developement. :)

As for me? 
nadda.

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